By Pink McKay

Responding to your baby’s cues, or non-verbal language, will help your little one little develop a sense  of trust in his ability to influence his environment and will help him form a secure attachment to you. As you soothe your baby , you are teaching him that when he is upset, he can calm down. When babies signals are ignored , and they escalate to cries that are not responded to, the baby fails to develop  the understanding that he can regulate his own emotions.

I’M HUNGRY: Babies give alot of subtle cues that they are ready to feed, long before they begin to cry - from rooting with their mouths to making sucking noises and trying to suck on their fists, as well as little noises that say “I’m working up to a cry”. If these signals are ignored they will yell.

PLAY WITH ME: Tiny babies have very short periods where they can actually ‘engage’ and interact with you, but as she grows, your little one will be able to play for longer periods and her signals will become much clearer. When your baby wants you to play , her eyes will become wide and bright and she may purse her tiny lips as though she is saying “ooh” as she turns towards your voice or looks at your face. She might grasp your finger or hold onto you. If you respond, your baby will make eye contact and smile , coo, babbly and talk.

GiVE ME A BREAK: When your baby needs a break from what she is doing, she will give very clear ‘disengaging’ signals such as looking away or turning her head away, squirming or kicking, coughing, spitting up or arching her back. If you keep playing when your baby tries to tell you she wants to stop, she will become agitated and make thrashing movements, or she will start fussing and crying.

I’M SLEEPY: Rather than waiting until your baby is ‘past is’, but him to bed as soon as he shows sleepy signs such as becoming quiet, losing interest in people and toys,making jerky movements or becoming very still, yawning, frowning and rubbing his eyes and ears. If you miss this window of opportunity, your baby is likely to become grumpy or she may become hyped up and will be much harder to settle.

Although these cues are typical signals that most babies will use to elicit the care they  need, each baby will develop his own mix of signals. By spending time watching your baby, along with some trial and error, you will learn to respond in just the way that suits your baby.

About the author - Pinky McKay is an Internationally Certified Lactation Consultant, a Certified Infant Massage Instructor with Infant Massage Australia and respected baby-care author.  Pinky’s parenting books are available here at bebe online. For more information about Pinky - www.pinkymckay.com.au.